So yes, in answer to my question, it is sometimes an imperative TO go out fir a cigarette. I wasn’t sure. That was my pain. I was meant to go out there and take that as a warning.
I thought I could post about my experience of Black America but now that I’m in the armchair over that due to my frankly admitting that i came to realize thst I had sexualized blacks–that’s a useful remark but it preempts further duscussion.
So yes I’ll take the pissing pervert as a warning and keep my further thoughts to myself, i am, i will add, in a very happy place, i couldn’t get it out about my mother but a major block in our relationship has cleared, maybe some time I will be able to write about it.