Why am I so friggin stupid. I dont take myself seriously. My inner voices TOLD me not to go to partial program, i went anyway, and i cried and i didn’t kniw why. My therapy session felt like a waste and i didn’t know why. The smoking pirch got way out of control and i didn’t kniw why.
I had a urinary tract infection. They can hurt so much they can make you psychotic. I thought u was being very wise to take a day off for urinary tract pain and requesting a doctors appointment to get pyridium. I finally went to the doctor today and they did a culture and what do you know, i have a urinary tract infection. I thought I just felt s littke under the weather. I think that the problem with this kind of pain is that it brings with it associations. Of tears and defeat from when I had this pain often.
I also realized at the doctors office that the extra Clozaril that the doctors is givig me during the daytime is making me overly sedated. I could tell that the doctor didnt like the looks of me. That’s what I get for hanging out with Davud from the State hospital and miss D. My ex finally got me out of there this morning I clearly saw him in my mind and i walked free from there, (there bring the smoke shack of course. When I went back after my doctors appointment nobody bothered me.)
