What a relief to have my blog to come back to! Its a small thing but its been a constant in my life for 8 years now. And what a long, strange trip its been.
I am fighting off feelings of despair today, feelibgs i havent had since high school. For a moment i thought id been “gotten” but i found myself rehaping around a new norm and springing back. Maybe “spring” is the operative word. Its just around the corner– the season, of course. I had feelings that everybody was taking my fathers side. I let my sister in at one point earlier today and i was too weak to beat bsck her offensive. And then i realized it doesn’t matter. I know what he did. If people want to be assholes about it doesnt change what happened i chose my course and it was shaped largely by his bring a super big asshole about what happened. I dont have to lie to protect him. He does a perfectly good job of that himself. I dont know whether thats what was up with the doctor at the hospital or not, but its a good bet it is. I was discharged too early, snd now im still really sick 3 days later. Its been a really hard 3 days. The bad part is that now i have to go live with them. Thats a tough one.